Friday, 27 March 2015

LETTERS TO LABOUR (IN THE TRADITION OF HRH)

Dear Mr Murphy,

Shortly after you were elected as the leader of the Scottish branch of the UK Labour Party, you said that you would not lose a single seat to the SNP.

If you should lose the odd seat to that party, will you resign your leadership?

Kind regards


Munguin.

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Dear Mr Murphy,

If the Tories have 290 seats, Labour has 280 seats and the SNP 45 seats, will your boss allow the Tories to form a minority government rather than work with the SNP to promote left of centre policies?

Best wishes

Munguin.

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Dear Ms Lamont,

As an elder stateswoman of the Labour Party, what do you think of the job Jim Murphy is doing?

Salutations

Munguin.

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Dear Labour,

The London Labour spokesperson on Work and Pensions has said that Labour is not the party of the unemployed, nor would it wish to be seen as such.

Whilst, of course, I was aware that the party was not exclusively dedicated to the unemployed, I thought that at least they had an interest in their welfare. Indeed I could be quite sure that they used to care about people who were out of work.

Would you care to indicate to the unemployed who they should now vote for if they wish to elect someone who gives a damn?

Sincerely

Munguin.

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Dear Mr McTernan,

I've been reading that you have on numerous occasions praised Mrs Thatcher and indicated that a Tory revival would be good for Scotland.

Is that the general feeling of the Labour Party in Scotland?

Best wishes

Munguin.

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Dear Mr Murphy,

Could you please let me know what would be your priority if Labour were to be elected to power in Scotland? (No, don't laugh.)

Would it be dealing with the number of people who are using foodbanks, or would it be making sure that Trident were renewed?

Your truly

Munguin.

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Dear Mr Murphy,

In England you appear to think that £6 000 is a reasonable amount for students to pay each year to avail themselves of a bachelor's degree. In Scotland you appear to think that that sum is £6 000 too much.

Could you explain what is different between Scottish and English students?

Kind regards

Munguin.

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Dear Mr Miliband,

It has been Labour policy for over 100 years to abolish the House of Lords.

It is SNP policy to abolish the House of Lords.

Is this something you could work together on, or would Willie Bain insist that 100 years of traditional Labour thinking on aristocratic rule be over turned because a wee lassie in a tin hat also happens to believe that?

Yours sincerely

Munguin.

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40 comments:

  1. Do, make us aware of any replies you, will no doubt, receive. I'm sure, your readers will be most interested.

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  2. Methinks you will get the reply that The Right Honourable Murph gave to Pete Wishart.

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    1. Oh yes, Munguin will publish any replies...

      He says if he gets the same response that Pete got, he'll bop him one. Pete being a gentleman; Munguin less so.

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  3. tris

    on your first scenario if the Conservatives gain the most seats they have
    the inalienable right to form a minority Government . The problems will only
    arise if they are unable to muster a majority vote in the house of commons.


    And now explain how we counter the Muslim /russian /north korean/nuclear Bomb ?
    wave the saltire run and hide in bog er ! beg the Americans to save us.
    and dont bother using the MAD doctrine some of the muslims are very happy to
    blow themselves and us to paradise .


    Could you explain what is different between Scottish and English students?

    English students wear clean underpants Scottish students go pantless
    and are actually Polish.

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    1. The Tories would have the right to form a government, as the are the incumbent party and in that scenario they would be right to do so. However, Labour with the support of the SNP, also have the right to vote against the Tories Queen speech, thus bringing down the Tory government, then the two parties could work together, with an absolute majority, to form a government that cannot lose a Queens speach vote.
      Or do you think labour, would prefer the Tories had another five years of shafting the UK, including Scotland?

      What fekin bomb?

      What's wrong with Polish students?

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    2. Niko, Could you please explain to me how and why an independent Scotland will have to counter other nations nuclear bombs ? What do independent Belgium, Norway, Denmark, Switzerland, Portugal, Italy etc. currently do about exactly the same situation ?

      They certainly aren't wasting Billions on weapons they can't afford.

      Is Scotland in some way unique and therefore subject to special persecution because we've had the temerity to assert our right to self determination ?

      Perhaps when we no longer meddle in their business or worse still bomb their populations other countries may choose instead to leave us be (not sure about the one closest to us though - they've got form).

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    3. Ah...

      Ok, I think I came too late to the party. As Jim points out...Jim Murphy himself said in 2010, that Labour had the right to try to form a government because they were incumbent. Mr Brown was in fact prime minster after the election which technically he had lost.

      We have no idea what the figures will be. The polls say the SNP will ahve 45-50 seats. Frankly I doubt it and I don;t think the party is counting on anything like that. It is possible that the Tories will win a majority... it is also possible that Labour will win a majority. In which cases the Liberals, SNP and Plaid, the Greens and the Irish can forget it, as per usual. And we will have a government elected by 35% of the vote imposed upon us.

      That's teh way the system works.

      What I want to know is what will happen if Ed is in a position to keep the Tories out by doing some sort of deal with the SNP or the Irish MPs.

      Will he do that deal, or will he allow the Tories to run the government again with maybe Farage, or the Liberals.

      Ian Smart is suggesting that it's not up to Ed. He says that some Labour MPs would walk away from voting with Labour if Ed did that...

      I want to know if Murphy is one of these MPs.

      Again I come late to the party about nukes. I'm sick of hearing that at a time of tension we HAVE to ahve nuclear weapons. As far as I know there are 8 countries with nuclear capability

      Approved by the UN there are The USA, France, Russia, China and the UK.

      Unapproved there are India, Pakistan, Israel, North Korea.

      There are over 200 countries in the world. I accept that we could probably exclude the likes of The Vatican, Burundi, Greenland, Monaco, etc, as having no international significance and therefore absolutely safe from the likes of Russia.

      Seriously I doubt if the same could be said of big regional powers like Germany, Spain, Brazil, Argentina, Canada, Poland, Australia, and many more.

      Some of the richest countries in the world don't have them... Saudi for example.

      How do they cope with the threat?

      The trouble with this argument that we have to have them to be safe suggests either that Britain is very special and more important than other countries... or that everyone needs them to keep safe.

      I just think that I'd rather kids had food than the likes of Cameron were able to swagger about on the world stage causing mayhem with their ignorant ill-conceived foreign policy based on this weapon.

      I'm not sure how you know about students' underpants. And I think I'd like to keep it that way!!!! :)




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  4. More power to your elbow in getting a reply, not good at replying I have found, you would need to send it to Westminster and as they have broken up for playtime. They will be too busy running round the doors soon meeting and greeting the constituents, as like Scarlett Johansen they do all their own stunts, aye right,
    Niko, should any of those people want to do damage to us, it will happen and more likely because we have weapons of mass destruction and a tendency in Westminster of sticking noses in other people's business. I notice that the Navy that great institution let a Russian Submarine up the Clyde without let or hindrance, Your other comments are as usual without much sense. If the English want their students not to be billed for their education they perhaps should stop voting Tory and that means Red, Blue or a nasty shade of Yellow.

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    1. You foget Helena, just what an important animal Munguin is.

      I'm pretty sure that at Labour headquarters right now, replies will be heading in Munguin's direction.

      Maybe they have asked Niko to do the letters?

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    2. You wouldn't know if Nico, wrote the replies or not. They would be pure gibberish, so how would you know, no matter who wrote them.

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    3. Niko would put in some Greek poetry ...

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    4. A bit of Homer perhaps, doh! Or perhaps an odyssey of his own? Some Aesop's fables, on the morality of new labour?

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    5. Helena


      Submarine up the Clyde ? Oooer wery painful but nice


      tris jimminy

      Of troubles none is greater than to be robbed of one’s native land.

      Euripides

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    6. "Talk sense to a fool, and he calls you foolish."

      Euripides

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    7. That old Euripides knew a thing or two.

      A bit of a hard read though....

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    8. Thanx, that's one of my favourite quotes; of all time. Quite apt I thought.

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    9. Aye he studied Niko to see nonsense in the raw.

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    10. knobends

      For simple are the words of truth.
      AESCHYLUS,

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    11. "You have been trapped in the inescapable net of ruin by your own want of sense.”

      Aeschylus

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    12. Now that's what we call raising the tone of things here on Munguin's Republic.

      A philosophical contest amongst the greatest of the Greeks...

      Now then, Lallands ... how you like them apples?

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  5. Could you ask Munquin to properly rephrase my question to Mr Murphy which is simply "How did such a bumptious, smarmy and obnoxious individual ever get anyone to vote for you?"

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    1. Munguin says that he will do that for you...his grammar being of a pretty superior nature... but he reminds you that his name has a "g" in the middle of it, not a "q"!

      Mind it's a good question.

      I guess it's probably because it is fundamentally a Tory seat and they like bumptious, smarmy, and obnoxious. A lot.

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  6. Incidentally, forgot to say that Munquin's letters are brilliant.

    John the Sycophant! XX

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    Replies
    1. Munguin says he knows that.

      But thanks you nonetheless.

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    2. PS Sorry to hear you're sick.

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  7. http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/rhondda-mp-chris-bryant-among-8937399
    One from Wales. Who is that happy fellow next to our own Mr Bryant?

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    1. Jim Murphy, the Labour Party leader in Scotland, owns a property bought with help from the taxpayer just two miles from the Palace of Westminster, which he let out. Over two years from 2012-13 he claimed £39,372 to rent another London flat for himself.

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    2. Diolch Anon...

      Yes, the so called "leader" of so called Scottish Labour... Ha, bloody ha.

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    3. And they are trying to smear Angus on the same lines but IPSA is the culprit with him.

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    4. They must be desperate if they are trying to get Angus on that. He almost gives them money. http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/politics/mp-ordered-by-watchdog-to-claim-higher-expenses-1.1049713

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    5. Un-bloody-believable, the system is set up to rip us off, and make the likes of spud a fortune.

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  8. Sweet... No wonder he keeps on at it even though he's no bloody good at it.

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  9. I am beginning to seriously think that Labour are taking the long-term view and have given up on winning this election. That would lead to a continuance of the Tory's austerity programme and make them even more unpopular at the next GE and allow Labour a free ride. They even have a spokesperson, more right wing than UKIP, claiming that they ignore the more unfortunate members of society. Why else do they go along with a lot of the Tory policies and why on earth did they appoint Milliband as UK Leader and Murphy as the "Scottish" leader? Disregarding Curran and Baillie it is difficult to think of two more fatuous and unelectable Labour pairing than these two. They even have Niko sometimes making sensible comments, surely an alien concept for a die-hard Labourite?

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    1. brownlie



      trialling different Medication to find one that works without
      bizarre side effects such as thought intrusions (usually pro union ones )

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    2. All the best with that, Niko, and I hope you will quickly be on the mend.

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